I don't write about that

I try no to write about my dating life very often as there are plenty of anecdotes one can hear about dating on a regular basis. Simply turn on your television past 11p, and you will see any number of single gal on the town typing single life witticisms on a laptop or single men acting quarkie with women on dates. It becomes a little depressing when you only get "apartment cable " and are left with a total of five stations (It also makes me question the demographic of tv watchers avoiding the news at 11pm). Go to any number of bars or cafes and just listen to other people- chances are you will eventually hear a sex/ dating story told much too loud for public ears but there it is.

It could also be that dating is the one topic I refuse to talk to my mom about in my life. It drives her crazy. I get worried that if she finds this blog and starts reading it she will think we can talk about it together over cocktails. While I love my mom, I just don't feel the need to talk about all my one night stands, hook ups, or month long relationships with her. None of it is significant enough to bother her with or have her get invested in. It will also make me look like a big old whore.

I once made the mistake of mentioning the fact that I had a sex life at Christmas during the post dinner drinks drunken boyfriend interrogation;

"So any new guys?"
"No"
(sip)
(sip)
" What about the lawyer, you seen him?"
"Ma, we are friends"
"Right, right right... what about that other guy"
(sip)
"There is no guy"
(sip)
"The one from last year?"
"No Mom"
(sip)
"Really? I thought you were-"
"Nope, no one"
"I mean its just you are so-"
"Mom- I get LAID if thats what you want to know!"
-Silence-
-Silence-
(gulp)
"So are you using safes*?"
"I need another drink"

*Safes= condoms

It's just not the conversation you want to have with your mom as an adult.

My point is that the market is saturated with dating stories and I don't know if I feel comfortable sharing dating stories (unless I am in a bar getting drunk shouting about how I was dumped again to my friends). However, I also think its a part of life, like picking your nose. I once told my niece who loves to pick her nose that it was OK she did it, just don't let anyone SEE you do it. Now when she is in a crowded room and wants to dig for gold she goes to the corner, gives us her back and picks away.

I am going to the corner now and talking about dating... to myself... while I pick my nose. Some things are better left unsaid. Granted- I wrote a whole post here before and decided to erase it after much thought and advisement so I was not fully above it at first. I decided I am really not into writing about dating- it gets messy, people know who you are talking about- and hell its kind of intimate and involves someone besides yourself. Why drag them through the blog mud unwillingly. It really doesn't make anyone like you more, in fact I think its a turn off to know you may be written about on some ass wipes blog if you go on a date. I have decided to leave that topic to the stupid asses who do it best with their lap tops in Starbucks and expensive shoes.